Complete and Utter Random Craziness
by xSlytherclaWx
Summary: Title says it all. Me and my friend were hyper when I wrote this, with her unknowing help, so its completely psyco... Involves Harry Potter. COMPLETED.. or as complete as it'll get. No Slash.
1. Completely Random

_**Complete and Utter Random Craziness**_

_**By XSlytherclaWx**_

_**(With (unknowing) help from Aligrl)**_

_**Chapter One: Completely Random**_

**Alicia: **I LOVE HARRY/HERMIONE.

**Helena:** I know you poor thing.

**Alicia: **(sticks out tongue)

**Alicia: **I love THIS COUPLE!

**Helena: **I made a double insult today.

**Alicia: **hmm. To who?

**Helena: **Heidi had this picture of a baby with a possesed looking smile and I said it "Has your smile, Heidi, and Kane's ears"

**Alicia: **(Laughs)

**Helena: **The moment she got this Kaila cracked up. And the moment Heidi got this she stabbed me with a pencil.

**Alicia: **i seriously want to meet your friends.

**Helena: **And Kane looked at me like he was super mad . they're crazy.

**Alicia: **as are mine.

**Helena: **It was funny.

**Alicia: **the wifeys, little Nate long hair's sputnik the potato, steffy the sharpie high dog, and me !. oh and Joel but he's no fun. Too bad bobby moved (Makes sad face)

**Helena: **Kane's first name is Joel... that's weird. Kane read my story.

**Alicia: **(Looks at Helena questioningly)

**Helena: **And he liked it. I made Kaila review in computer class.

**Alicia: **(laughs) what is Kane's real name?

**Helena: **Joel.

**Alicia: **I mean why do u call him Kane.

**Helena: **That's his middle name and he's always been called that

**Alicia: **ohh

**Helena: **anyway

**Alicia: **ok

**Helena: **I'm going to read Narnia in Spanish...though I don't really know much Spanish... I'm just doing it for fun.

**Alicia: **(laughs)

**Helena: **ASLAN KNOWS ALL!

**Alicia: **okay

**Helena: **I know! I SHALL MAKE NICKNAMES FOR MY FRIENDS! Mars is Bright tonight

**Helena**- LUNA GET OFF MY BLOODY KEYBOARD!

**Luna**- OK

**Helena: **sorry that was Luna... you know how she is, and now Edmund's coming. Bloody Perfect! I should just have a bloody party with all sorts of bloody people!

**Alicia: **(laughs)

**Ron-** the bloody things that muggles make

**Hermione-** RONALD!

**Alicia: **(laughs)

**Helena-** I nearly got caught by the teacher saying Bloody Hell today

**Ron-** So what? I say it all the time

**Ginny-** So THAT explains all the detentions.

**Edmund:** getting caught by a teacher saying that is not so bad... now getting caught by a teacher while blowing up about how somebody's such a bloody moron... I can see if you got in trouble for that.

**Alicia: **(laughs hard)

**Helena**- Ed, I almost did caught doing that... to Michael Shoshanna. I was calling him a bloody moronic prick... a bugger... all sorts of things

**Lucy:** That was rather mean

**Alicia: **oh wells

**Ed:** MEAN? What d'you know about mean?

**Ginny:** (Laughing hysterically at what I did to Michael)

**Hermione and Harry:** (Walk away at my stupidity)

**Ed:** Maybe they'll snog each other to death

**Ron:** (Looks as if he could Kill Ed)

**Alicia: **YAY

**Ginny:** Ickle Ronnikins fancies Hermione!

**Alicia: **(giggles)

**Ron:** DO NOT!

**Helena:** then lower your wand and stop trying to remember the Killing Curse

**Alicia:** (Laughs hysterically)

**Seamus**: Ron sod off.

**Ron:** (sods off)

**Helena:** NOW YOU LEAVE SEAMUS! YOU TOO SU! I don't allow disbelievers of magic here.

**Seamus:** But I still believe in magic!

**Helena**: I know YOU do... it's Su I was saying that to

**Alicia: **I BELIEVE IN MAGIC

**Ed:** Bloody brilliant... Lucy! I think we've found your twin

(Caspian walks in, followed By Eustace Scrubb, Jill Pole, and Cedric Diggory.)

**Alicia: **go snog each other Jill and Eustace! Go Snog Caspian, Lucy!

**Helena, Peter and Ed:** (LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY)

**Alicia:** (laughs as well)

**Caspian, Lucy, Jill, and Eustace:** (don't seem amused)

**Cedric:** Who is that?

**Helena:** A girl who wants to snog you and Caspian (Alicia)

**Alicia: **WHAT! Caspian only!

**Helena:** You still picked Ced over Harry

**Alicia: **still!

**Caspian:** (stares, open mouthed)

**Alicia:** (laughs hysterically)

**Ed:** Then why'd you tell Lu and Caspian to snog?

**Alica: **you remind why I'm friends with you right now, Helena! I'm not quite sure, Edmund. Wait! YOU'RE RIGHT CASPIAN MINE (grabs him and takes him SOMEWHERE)

**Lucy:** leaves, is not amused

**Peter:** Laughs out loud

**Ed:** I think you're right. Lucy fancies Caspian

**Helena:** I KNOW SHE DOES! THANK YOU!

**Jill and Eustace:** (Trying in vain to suppress laughter.)

**Edmund:** (listening to song playing on stereo)

**Helena:** (quickly skips it when she realizes Edmund is listening)

**Ed**: HEY WHAT WAS THAT SONG ABOUT!

**Helena:** What d'you think? Turkish Delight. Duh... they only said it 50 times

**Ed:** turns green

**Digory:** Hey Polly c'mon! (enters room, pulling Polly along)

**Polly:** OKAY!

**Alicia:** (laughs from other room)

**Drunk Ron:** WHyyy don't youuu two snoggg... yourrre holdinggg handsss

**Ginny and Luna:** (Go to take care of Ron)

**Ed:** WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO CASPIAN!

**Alicia**: (still in other room) many things.

**Caspian:** (can be heard screaming HELP)

**Helena:** (Laughs hysterically)

**Alicia: **(Laughs from other room)

**Polly:** Why'd that redheaded drunk boy just tell me and Digs to snog?

**Alicia: **(still is laughing in other room)

**Helena**: Er...

**Ed:** Er...

**Peter:** Er...

**Jill and Eustace:** Er... um... you see...

**Digory:** (turns bright red)

**Helenaand Ed: (**Laugh hysterically (yet again))

**Peter:** (Joins in laughter)

**Polly:** (stands there confused...)

**Digory, meanwhile:** (Shuffles his feet, and stares downward awkwardly)

**Eustace**: (Begins to Laugh)

**Alicia: **TO BE CONTINUED

**Helena:** Okay (STOPS TIME)

_**Authoress' Note: Aligrl is my friend and we were joke IMing eachother, and this converstion is the result.**_

_**Helena**_


	2. Utter Craziness

_**Complete and Utter Random Craziness**_

_**Chapter Two:**_

_**Utter Craziness**_

_**By XSlytherclaWx**_

_**Authoress' Note: Okay well, my friends and I were talking today about what would we do in a few scenarios and I just wanted to make a fic about it. There's not Much More to say. Except Note: Risa loves cute guys… she'll kiss any she sees. Zoe doesn't find any Narnian guys cute… and she gets creeped out by any… and she wouldn't like to go to Narnia. Ana, well, she loves Skandar Keynes and Edmund Pevensie for one, and then there's the whole 'I wish I could get into Narnia so bad' thing.**_

_**Your Authoress,**_

_**Helena**_

_**WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF…**_

…_**you went into Narnia, and you saw Edmund right before the witch came down on her sledge?**_

**Risa: **Slap Edmund, tell him "get down" and maybe accidentally kiss him.

**Zoe and Ana: **(stare at her blankly)

**Risa: **_What?_ He's cute.

**Ana: **I'd probably do the same thing. Except maybe, I would add moron in there. Like "get down, moron, or she'll see us". Maybe I'd shock him with a kiss and then tell him "Get down Ed!"

**Zoe: **You two are crazy. I'd try and get back home.

… _**you magically were transported to the Professor's house?**_

**Risa: **run?

**Zoe: **…

**Ana: **Is the wardrobe there?

… _**you were magically transported to the Professor's house and there were four kids there, two boys and two girls?**_

**Risa: **I'd look around to see if either of the boys are cute. Then I'd kiss the cute one.

**Ana:** Well if one of the boys is Edmund… (Laughs evilly)

**Zoe: **What does (laughs evilly) mean?

**Ana: **(smiles creepily)

**Zoe: **What does it mean?

**Ana: **(stares at picture of Skandar Keynes)

**Zoe: **I get it. Wait! Eww!

**Ana and Risa: **(laugh hysterically at Zoe's probable mental image)

**Zoe: **(screaming)_ Get it out! Get it out!_

… _**you met the witch?**_

**Risa: **shove the Turkish delight in her face.

**Ana: **(waves a picture of Turkish delight in front of her face to show how tempting it is)

**Risa: **On second thought… I'd eat the Turkish delight myself.

**Zoe: **RUN AWAY.

**Ana: **Break her wand. Duh. Edmund had the common sense enough to do it. I'm sure I would.

… _**Edmund Pevensie asked you out?**_

**Risa: **(begins to say something but Ana cuts her off)

**Ana: **Say yes! Say yes! Say yes! Say _**YESSSS**_!

**Zoe: **Say_** no**_!

_**... you reviewed this story?**_

**Risa: **This is a story? Where are all the cute guys?

**Zoe:** stories don't always have cute guys, Risa.

**Ana: **Tell Edmund and Skandar I love them!

_**FIN**_

_**Authoress' Note: Okay I understand I've been doing humor a lot lately… but think of it! How much romance do I write? A LOT. So I'm working on my other fics as well… but this is based on a real conversation me and my friends had. Risa's not cute-boy obsessed though… She DOES think Skandar Keynes is cute, and tomorrow, I will begin rubbing it in her face (telling ME I'm too obsessed with certain celebrities). The real Ana is less Skandar Keynes/ Edmund Pevensie obsessed (though her answers are accurate), and tomorrow, I will show her my print-out of Skandar Keynes and rub it in her face that she doesn't have one. Zoe is less boring… its just; she doesn't like Narnia that much with the amount that I talk of it (she'd kiss Aslan, non-romantically of course, she calls him a 'cute lil lion'). Try to explain to her that he's not little, nor would he seem so cute in real-life, and you have what I faced all December. I think that's it.**_

_**Helena**_


End file.
